Day 1
I am on a train, in danger I think,
moving quickly, holding on for dear life
but with no real fear
of anything.

I am surrounded
by those I know
but I do not feel like myself.

The train stops and
we hide in our open air
seats till we continue
on again..

I do not know where we are going
or see when arrive there.
Day 2
I am sitting in a bathtub.
the lovely kind with feet,
there is no water and I
am fully clothed.

I look around and there are countless bathtubs,
all side by side, perched atop very high pillars.

There are people in many of them,
but not all. We each move by
leaping from tub to tub.
Sometimes there are
two or three of us in a tub.

I see at a distance a tiger.
She is coming towards me.

I feel afraid as I begin to leap,
not looking down.
Day 3.
I am on a boat,
kayak like, small,
with familiars that I
cannot place.

The water and air are cold
and we are all bundled,
rowing to keep warm,
escaping perhaps.

Suddenly a sea creature
shows himself,
all tentacles and
one huge menacing eye.

We struggle wildly and
manage to beat him back
with our oars and boots,

but not until after
many have been stung.

Next we are ashore
in a warm comfortable place.
A doctor of sorts places
a blue jewel on my back
on the place where
I was stung.

He tells me
I cannot
fall asleep,
that if I do
I won’t wake again.

I struggle to keep my eyes open
longing for an escape
from the tiredness
and sorrow.
Day 4.
(in the middle of my first books editing)

I dreamt of a book
I haven’t yet written
dedicated to a daughter
not yet conceived.
Day 5.
I am climbing
forever climbing
up a gigantic ladder
made of pink hula-hoops.

The sky around me is beautiful blue
the sun is shining and there are
fluffy white clouds at regular intervals.

Eventually I reach the top.
I jump.

The fall is delicious,
warm air on my face.

I wake up before I hit the ground.



We go into the wilderness
to find a wilder version of ourselves,
to release her out into the world.

We look, trying to see everything
between the curves and the edges,
how it blends together and fades.
We circle back, again and again,
each time getting just a little
closer to the center.

The sounds of the ocean and
the windswept pines belong together.

We desire. We demand. We rage.
We are quiet when we should speak.
We shed layers. Grow. Surrender. Leave behind.
We die and come alive again.

We dance wildly in an empty room
trying to enjoy instead of endure.
We live together on our separate planets.
We arrive again and again.

My body was made for this.

mind control

On a hot day in Mexico
we found ourselves
on a boat, a pirate
ship replica (lovely and
accurate, with a plank
and everything) and
O how it rocked and
rolled with the waves.
There was a small girl
who had fallen asleep
with her head resting
on a trash can. But I
wasn’t sick, and when
you asked me why
I said “mind control”
and smiled looking
out over the water.



The winged creatures
took over the skies
as we watched them.
“watch your eyes!”
she yelled to me
as I walked confidently
out on the porch.

The magic of it was enough
to command me to action.

I began checking dreams
off my list
one by one.
Working hard and quickly
but sometimes missing
the joy with my constant

When a problem arises,
I remind myself,
it is best to dig at the root
instead of hacking away wildly
at the leaves.

I watch them flock together
with no clear leader.
How nice it must be
to not have a need for control.


On some nights
all things feel like
they have been
done before.

Tonight, if you listen closely
you can hear the night sky
breaking apart
as all young and beautiful
things do.

The apples
on the tree
taste sweeter
this year.
I know you have waited patiently
but that does not speed
my coming. I hear in my head
on the nights that I am quiet.
I cannot keep on like this.

The world is upside down.

I think he’s building a sandcastle
He says to me slyly
of our cat jumping
maniacally at the wall.

I smile, but do not feel it
too quick to anger,
out of control
and ever changing.

I comfort myself with minutia,
lists and a false sense of control.

You can curse
the weather man
but you cannot
change his