Thursday morning

Stuck inside on the only nice day in week
longingly looking at the window
feeling both trapped and glad
at the same time.

Barley understanding myself
I am happy there is no one here
to try to explain it too.

I don’t know what I want.
I want both.
I want neither.
I want it all.
Whatever that means.

I don’t even know what it means.

So I go back to looking out the window.