Speak up
This is the thing I want to say:
when I was young
I never knew that there was
more than one path open to us,
that we could make the difficult choice
but I want you
to know it.
Sometimes I don’t know how to do
the thing that I have to do,
the thing that I have chosen.
Sometimes my
skin feels inside out
and my body like it is in 12
places at once.
Sometimes I try to tell someone
but I am behind glass.
No one can hear me.
No one can see my face
without a blur hiding its detail.
Lately I am a calm sea
quiet, with slow, constant motion
but no release.
The small waves
are lulling me into a trance
that will take me through
the long days of darkness
and winter and waiting
but this false calm
cannot last.
I am ready now
to show my
true face.
I am made of fire and earth
and they do not hide.
I look around and see
so many others still hiding
and I wonder why we keep
trying to exert ourselves
over things clearly
so much more
powerful than
we are.
Susan Sweetland Garay 